we dance.
You steady me
Slow and sweet, we sway
Take the lead and I will follow
Finally ready now
To close my eyes and just believe
That You won’t lead me
Where You don’t go
These lyrics from the song We Dance by Bethel have been a source of comfort to me lately. I feel like it’s mine and Jesus’ song.
I’m leaving for Georgia tomorrow. There is a part of me that feels like I’ve been home from the Race for quite sometime now, and another part of me that feels like we just got home last week, not three months ago. And here I am packing up my things to leave again and saying goodbyes.
It’s hard to leave. My little brother always teases me saying I just want to go wherever is far away from my family. Well, that’s not quite true (and he knows that it is not), it is never easy to leave my family. I’ll miss the birthdays, yet again. I’ll miss the bbq’s and the s’mores around the fire pit in our backyard. I’ll miss my sweet nephew and his amazing hugs (he gives some of the best). I’ll miss the birth of my newest niece or nephew in December. I just said goodbye to my little brother, and it’s strange hearing the words, “I’ll see you at Christmas” slip out of my mouth. Again, I will be in a place where I can’t just drive two hours to hang out with some of my best friends.
It’s always a strange feeling to leave home. It’s exciting, because I know I’m going where I need to go, I’m doing what I need to do, I’m doing the thing that makes me come alive. But it’s hard because it means saying goodbye to the people who are nearest and dearest to my heart.
Though it is hard leaving, at the same time, somehow, it’s not. And I know that doesn’t make any sense. It completely contradicts itself. But I think that is what following God is like. He calls us to do these things, small or big as they may seem, and sometimes it just doesn’t make sense. We find ourselves in certain situations, and it doesn’t make sense. You can’t explain it. You can’t put your finger on it. You just have to go and follow Him, trusting completely that He will reveal the next step, and then the next. And somewhere along the way you find that He has always been walking before you, beside you, and behind you, and there is nowhere else you’d rather be. So you go, joyfully, because you know that you are walking in His presence, and there is nowhere else you’d rather be.
Making this move to Georgia to be a part of CGA feels a lot like I’m dancing with Jesus. I don’t know the steps, I’m no dancer. I don’t like dancing at all, actually. I am the definition of the awkward and uncoordinated dancer who knows no dance moves. But I am choosing to dance with Him anyway, letting Him lead me. Allowing Him to show me the steps. To hold me up when I stumble.
Already my CGA experience is looking differently than expected. I have never seen the houses that the apprentices (that is what we are called) live in but just to give you an idea of what I was expecting, I’ve heard much about what they call the Lake House. So when I got my housing assignment you can imagine my surprise when I found out instead of “Lake House” I was going to be living in a doublewide in a large trailer park that I guess is known as “Little Mexico”. And instead of living with all girls it will be a co-ed house, and one of my housemates is Tim, who is a squadmate of mine. So D Squad will be well represented in Little Mexico! 🙂 AND, it won’t be ready for us when we arrive on Friday so we will be crashing at random places for a week or so.
I can’t help but laugh when I tell people my housing assignment, because God is just so funny. I feel like this is him saying, “Kaci, you literally have no idea what I have for you in these upcoming months.”
I’m really excited about it though. We are the first group from Adventures to live there. Already, there is a missionary living in this trailer park who is in the process of starting a church there, or maybe she already has. Either way, I think God is going to bring up some really cool opportunities and I am excited to get to be a part of it.
So I am dancing with Jesus. I don’t know the steps, but I am trusting Him to lead the way. I am standing on His feet, letting him carry me as we dance our way around the room.
And we dance
And I will lock eyes
With the One who’s ransomed me
The One who gave me joy for mourning
And I will lock eyes
With the One who’s chosen me
The One who set my feet to dancing
If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook, you know that I have started a fund board. Daily I am amazed at how many squares I am filling in. Thanks to many of you, I have exceeded my first financial deadline, which was this coming Friday. But I’m still not fully funded. I am still in need of $5,235 and this board is one way to get me closer to reaching that amount. Would you consider buying a square and donating that amount to my support account? (Square 81=$81) Click on the Support Me! tab at the top of this page to do so. You can reach me at [email protected] if you have any questions or want to know more about what I will be doing.
I’ve struggled with the idea of having to support raise again. Receiving what was my last paycheck for at least 8 months, was bittersweet to say the least. I want you to know that I would not stand here, asking for your support, if I did not 110% believe that this is something that I was supposed to do, something that Jesus has called me to. I believe in Adventures in Missions as an organization and what they are about and what they are doing for the Kingdom. I believe in the Center for Global Action (CGA), in how they are equipping a generation of people who are completely sold out to Jesus, to activate us in what He is calling us to do, doing so through living in community, discipleship, and teaching.
I don’t have a big picture of what the future will be after my time in Georgia and Guatemala, but I don’t need the full picture. Instead, in faith and absolute trust, I will keep taking the next step, and then the next, as God reveals the picture.
In other news, I put together a video from my 11 months on the Race. It’s hard to describe the Race, but this is my attempt to do so through pictures. I know that this was just a small part of my story as a whole, but it is one that I will forever be grateful that I got to be a part of, one that has changed my relationship with the Lord, and deeply impacted my life in more ways than one. God has used the World Race to change me, mold me, and redefine what I want my life to be about, and it’s simple – Jesus.
An endless amount of thank you’s and love for your amazing support. None of it would have been or would be possible without you.
